On what's scary - and fun

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This rather long post serves as a breathless excuse as to why I have been a somewhat negligent blogger as of late.  The short-short version, for those of you with limited attention spans (don't look at me like that - I'm one of you!), is that I am omgstartingmyownbusiness! And wow.  It is hard work - and I have barely scratched the surface so far.

I have always worked at "safe" jobs.  Predictable hours, pay, and people.  Even when I worked at a restaurant, I went the hostess route because the shifts were stable and the tips small but predictable.

About seven months ago, I landed what seemed like a dream job: a 9-5 position as an administrative assistant for a respected neurosurgeon and professor.  I ordered coffee.  I paid bills.  I set up meetings. I typed memos and emails and made travel arrangements. I learned a lot and I earned respectable pay.  I was acceptably good at my job.

Once in a while, I would do non-administrative work around the office.  I would help my boss write academic papers and grant applications.  I would help him with wording and editing.  I helped with some of the copy on a website for one of his business ventures.  And I was excellent at those things.  All of a sudden the work day would blast by me - I felt not just proficient, but truly motivated.

I began to realize that when I enjoyed what I did, it not only was it more fun, but I was better at it.  I took pride in my work in a way I never had in a nonacademic setting.  And gradually, I realized something.  I realized that I could do this full-time.  I could take the parts of my job that I loved - writing and editing, creating and marketing, collaborating for new ideas - and separate them out from the parts I hated. Like university bureaucracy, buggy financial systems and miles of Excel spreadsheets.

I could become a freelance writer!  A literary jack-of-all-trades.  Copy-editor, copy writer, business letters, ghostwriting, proofreading, I could do it all and charge by the page. I could set my own priorities and succeed or fail on my own damn initiative.  What a brilliant idea!

The only problem, of course, is that freelancing is scary.  You have to seek out your own clients.  You don't get company health insurance and pensions.  You have to market yourself like a mofo and organize the hell out of your life.  And of course, the more I researched, the scarier things got.  I have to charge GST? I don't even know what I'm charging per page!  What if I can't find clients?  What if, what if, what if? How do I guarantee I will maintain a livable income? Oh god, I'm gonna need a website!


The thing is, though, pretty much everything worth having or doing in life seems to be basically terrifying.  Learning to drive.  Moving out of your parents' house.  Moving across the country to go to school. Falling in love.  Travelling on your own.

Change is nerve-wracking.  But nothing truly amazing ever comes from remaining static, does it?  So, long story short, I did it.  Well, I took the first step.  I left my job, resigned myself to living back home for a little while longer (I pay rent, guys! I'm not a freeloading ungrateful child! I have a history degree!), and am now devoting myself, full-time to doin' this thing.  I have stacks of library books out on business, on working as a consultant, on freelancing, marketing, copywriting.  I'm compiling contact lists and writing inquiry letters and making up business plans, and it is terrifying.  But it's also the most motivated I have been in years - I am so excited to be taking charge of my own career!

If anyone has any tips, tricks, or advice to share, I am of course all ears.  Ideas? Suggestions? Words of caution or encouragement? Offers of work?